What the Scientists are Thinking About

"Ow!  You're crushing my fingers!"
“Ow!  Daddy this fish’s handshake is crushing my bones.”
“Ha ha! That’s not a fish, honey, it’s a marine mammal!”

Research Shows that Dolphins Are Ten Times Stronger than Human Athletes

Researchers at the Liquid Life Laboratory at West Chester University headed by a researcher actually named, Frank Fish, set out to determine whether a dolphin is ten times stronger than a human athlete.

Some of  Frank Fish’s colleagues –Paul Porpoise and Mary Marine-Mammal — wanted the research to determine whether dolphins were five times as strong as  as human athletes but apparently Frank Fish has to have his own way or he’ll end up pouting even more than usual.

Using nothing but a scuba tank and an ordinary garden soaker, the researchers watched the vortices in the water created by the dolphins to determine how fast the dolphins  were swimming.

The researchers were able to determine that the  dolphins were swimming way, way faster than a human athlete, that’s for sure, but are holding off on  announcing their findings until they double check  what the word “vortices” means again.

What did the hyena cross the road? To get to the better jokes! Now that's funny!
“What did the hyena cross the road?”
“To get to the better jokes!”
“Ahhahaha!  Now that’s funny!”

Hyenas could possibly be as bright as some primates — but either way have a much better sense of humor

Researchers have discovered that Hyenas are adept at solving problems and can even count (which would explain their excellent comedic timing).  Scientists now believe that the hyenas may even have intelligence levels that match some primates.

After studying the expressions on  hyenas’ faces ad nauseam,  researchers have concluded that hyenas can assess the size of a competing pack by listening to the rival packs’  laughter — to determine if the rival  pack out number them as well as whether or not the  jokes the rival pack of hyenas were laughing at were actually funny.

Scientists also observed that hyenas solved problems through trial and error. When the hyenas were confronted with a box of food, the hyenas tried to get it out trying different methods until they were successful — causing scientists to be even more impressed with the  intelligence of the hyenas — because apparently none of the scientists has ever owned a dog or a cat.

The scientists were quick to point out,  however,  that scientists are still smarter than hyenas.

Yes I could just tell you the answer, but first, let me explaining starting with creation and working my way up the timeline of mankind.
“Yes I know the correct answer, dear, but first let me clarify things by going back to the creation of the universe then working my way up the time line of events  year by year until we get  to present the day.”

Do You Suffer From Hindsight Bias?

Those who “knew the answer all along” may not be quite as clever as they are making themselves out to be,” say researchers at Northwestern University in Chicago.

After studying this “thinking you know something when you don’t” phenomenon, they  have come to the conclusion that people too often feel they knew something all along, but actually didn’t — they just thought they did.  Researchers call this phenomenon: Hindsight Bias.

However, a  group of highly-respected women who have been studying the  phenomenon  for the past 37 years have come up with what they feel is a more appropriate term for hindsight bias:  Husbands.

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Until next time . . . I love you