You had to have your attorney revise your will so the kids won’t someday be fighting over their toilet paper inheritance.

Three Syllables: Tramp-o-line

You’re pretty sure you’ve managed to gain seven “free-sample” pounds since signing up for your Costco membership unless that scale from the six-pack of scales you purchased was wrong.

Your set for diapers from cradle to grave.

When laid end-to-end,  your Q-tip inventory now extends well past Saturn stopping just short of Uranus, thankfully.

Your vitamin water collection has taken on its own tide.

You got all your Christmas shopping done early thanks to the best deal on rototillers EVER!

You can finally build that copy-paper Ream Vacation Getaway!

You’re starting to experience buyer’s remorse over the Euro-Bellybutton Steamer

And finally, a surefire way to tell if you’ve overdone it at Costco:

Have you ever GOT MILK!

Until next time . . . I love you