Aaaaand it’s fake Friday again! One tiny problem I have with the calendar is that it’s so repetitive and predictable. That’s why I like Friday Fictioneers — a 100-word, picture-prompt writing challenge over at Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, Addicted to Purple — because it starts on Wednesdays. And I think you’d agree that nothing spices up the week like having Friday on Wednesday! Anyway, here’s this week’s picture prompt by way of Scott Vanatter: (copyright – Indira)
Mr. Sims and the Maple Bar of Death
“No, Mr. Sims, you misunderstood my instructions.”
“But you asked me if I wanted to do a donut, so I spun out.”
“No, I asked if you wanted the rest of my donut.”
“So I flunked my driver’s test?”
“That will depend on your three-point turn.”
“I can do that with my eyes closed!”
“Careful Mr. Sims! That’s a sheer drop off . . . LOOK OUT!”
“What happened?”
“You’ve plunged us off the cliff, Mr. Sims.”
“So I flunked my driver’s test?”
“Yes.”
“Okay . . . but one last question.”
“Yes?”
“You gonna eat the rest of that maple bar?”
* * *
Until next time . . . I love you
Linda Vernon Humor 
I laughed as I was finishing my chocolate bar donut.
Ha! Now that’s what I call perfect timing! 😀
What in the whippoorwill is a maple bar? I think I need one. Sounds like the perfect travel food!
What? Never had a maple bar? Melissa! Oh you definitely need to take a maple bar destination vacation! We had them in Washington and they have them in CA, I guess North Dakota is too cold for maple bars? http://youtu.be/nXg8H–CJJE
Poor Melissa, perhaps they call them Long Johns where she lives (which would make sense in North Dakota). As a kid, that was my favorite pastry in the donut shop, but I must confess, I’ve never seen one as large as the one in the Youtube video.
Ha! Me either, but I think that’s the birthday cake I’m requesting this year when my birthday rolls around. And I’m eating it all myself!
So is it a doughnut?? I looooove maple doughnuts.
Yes it’s exactly like a maple donut only shaped liked a rectangle with no hole. So you get more!! You’d love them! 😀
Okay! I totally get it now! We call them “longjohns.” And the round ones without a hole in the middle we call “bismarcks.”
Bismarcks! Really? HA! Bismark North Dakota certainly has a big head about their maple bars! LoL!!:D
Hi! My name is Arsen. I am a designer from Spain. Your blog seems pretty interesting to me, hence I’d like to befriend with you.
Hi Arsen. Thank you for coming by! I’m always happy to make a new friend. Welcome! 😀
ahaha! sounds like our drivers tests!
I know, doesn’t it? HA! 😀
sadly! 😉
Well at least we didn’t kill anybody (that I know of)!
maybe 😉
hahaha! 😀
I just guffawed coffee (iced) over everything!!!
🙂
I love it! HA! Now all you need is a maple bar to spew . . . no maybe not . . . Although a maple bar does sound good to me right now –even spewed! 😀
Cute story! Loved the dialogue.
Thanks Waiting! 😀
Funny stuff, darling. I remember being terribly nervous and flunking my first driver’s test — maybe not this badly, but…
I flunked my too. And nobody offered me a maple bar either.
Wonderful! for this contest, I hope you win (a calendar with days of the week clearly labeled))!
Hahaha! That’s exactly what I always wanted too! 😀
do you have to take a driver’s test to eat food where you live – first do a donut and then eat a maple bar?
Ha ha! Yes, which is exactly why I flunked my driver’s test. I was doing a maple bar while eating a donut. (I’m always getting right from left mixed up too.)
Lovin’ it.
Ah! Thanks Undercover! 😀
This take flunking to a whole new (lower) level. 🙂 When our driving instructor would say, “Turn left here”, we might be heard to ask, “Left?” He’d say “Right.” And of course we’d say, “Right???”
P.S. “sheer drop-off”
janet
Yes! Turn right here left! LOL! I didn’t know left from right when I took my driver’s test all those years ago. (I still don’t). So every time I was asked to make a turn, I would pretend like I was saluting the flag to make sure I was turning the correct direction. I think he still had to say you’re other left several times.
And much thanks for the heads up on sheer! 😀
Funny! Just as we’ll he flunked the test, isn’t it?
Ha! Yes. Get Mr. Sims off the road as soon as is possible. Too bad the instructor had to give his life for it but some causes are worthy enough to sacrifice one’s life, especially in this case! 😀
HAHAHAHAHA!!!! You know,m I used to work in a doughnut shoe. Made and sold PLENTY of those maple bars. Funny, good construction, everything! Great!
That’s doughnut STORE!!!!! (stupid computer!)
Haha! Hey I wouldn’t mind working donut shoe either! LOL!! 😀
So glad you liked this little foray into the world of driver’s tests and maple bars! I’d be curious to know if you ever got sick of donuts? I don’t think I ever would — especially not maple bars!
No, I never did get sick of doughnuts, though I didn’t want them necessarily all the time. Same for ice-cream, too.
This is what I never want to be in my life – a driving instructor! I’d be sure to get someone like Mr Sims 😉
Ha ha! Me too Diane! I would make the worst driving instructor on in America, and you would hold the title for the worst driving instructor in Australia! LOL! 😀
Loved it! Going through these and yours gave me a chuckle. Thanks!
Oh that’s nice to here Shainbird! 😀 Thanks!
Great take on the prompt, a driving test that puts my first one in the shade.
Ha! You and me both Sandra! 😀
one, i want a maple bar. and two, your story’s hilarious. and i loved that the characters are so calm about the accident! haha ^^
Ha! Yes they were pretty calm were’t they KZ! I just hope Mr. Sims had time to eat that maple bar before they got to the bottom! 😀
Ha! I don’t know what a maple bar is either, but I’d probably want one too after plunging over a cliff!
Oh you would want one Perry. Cliff or no cliff, maple bars are delish! 😀
Maybe they have chocolate old fashions in Heaven! Mmmmm. Now I’m craving a donut!
Me too. But what else is new?
Spoken like a true teenage boy!
Yes! You are soooo right! HA! 😀
hilarious ! 😀 flunking down the cliff !
So glad you liked my “cliff hanger” Shreyank! 😀
Wonderful. I burst out laughing at the line “So I flunked my driver’s test?” and just kept laughing.
David your comment is music to my inner-reading voice ears! 😀
If I could stop laughing at the dialogue, I might take this seriously. Reminds me of one of the “city-kids” we had in my driver’s ed class 20 years ago. Sad, but true. Thanks for the memory!
It is sad but true! I actually ran the car into a ditch the first time I got behind the wheel in driver’s ed. Oh it was so embarrassing! I still don’t like to drive to this day! 😀
Oh, dear. The first time I pulled into the lane at my foster home, I missed the driveway and wedged the car into the culvert. It took them 16 hours and a heavy duty crane-thingy to get it out. I was terrified of driving into the lane after that and would call ahead so someone could drive it in for me.
Oh No!!! How horrible! And they had to get a crane? LOL!! I don’t blame you at all for trying to get someone to drive for you! I would have done the same thing. 😀
I think I just LOL’d in my mouth a little bit – loved this one!
Hahahahaha! Troy!! Hahahahaha.
Linda you are so hilarious. I guess we should know that based on the smile you share with us in your gravatar. I look forward to every one of your posts because I know it will be worth a chuckle, laugh or ROTFL! Keep writing the funny!
Oh Joe! I can’t tell you how happy your comment makes me. Thank you! I certainly will try keep bringing funny! 😀
I laughed. Dear, dear.
Glad you liked it Patrick! 😀
oh delightful/ pushing the instructor passed the limits tho I doubt he is playing with a baker’s dozen
Haha! I’ll bet he doesn’t even have 6 of one and half a dozen of other! 😀
Dear Linda,
That instructor must’ve been on some heavy tranquilizers to remain that calm after being plunged over a cliff. I’d write about my driver’s ed experience but it would be more of a tragedy than a comedy.
Fun story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Ha ha Rochelle! I have a feeling there’s a tragic driver’s ed story somewhere in all our pasts! 😀
Well done Linda, your usual standard.
Being a Brit I’m not sure about all these foodie/chocolate/candy/yummy bars of whatever it is they were eating. From the comments they sound delicious
Dee
So glad you liked it Dee. I’m trying to think what the equivalent of a maple bar would be the UK. And I guess I haven’t got a clue. Do you have donuts there? Or maybe they over there they are biscuits with holes? HA! 😀
Now that was funny and fun and I would die for a maple bar. 🙂
Me too Jackie! Me too! 😀
Very humorous. And I love the title.
So glad you enjoyed it Tony! 😀
Dear linda,
Your story put me in mind of bill murray teaching the groundhog to drive in Groundhog Day. Well put together and a little bit loony. love it.
Aloha,
Doug
Aha! I love that scene. Groundhog Day is one of my very favorite movies of all time. (Side of the eyes!) So glad you enjoyed it Doug! 😀
Very funny, made AnElephant chortle.
Hah! Wonderful! Making an elephant chortle is always my goal, AnElephant! 😀