We’ve all felt a little awkward when trying to think of topics for discussion when networking at the Chamber of Commerce. That’s why I have compiled these sure-fire conversation starters designed to make new friends and influence people while simultaneously impressing them big time.

“Hey there! I can tell by the sweat accumulating around your hairline that it is, indeed, hot enough for you.”

Starting up a conversation by talking about the weather is always a congenial way to break the ice.

“I’d offer you one of my dog biscuits, but I left them at home.”

This isn’t necessarily a good conversation starter, as such, but it will buy you time to think up another topic while the person is wondering whether it is safe to be standing next to you.

“So what business are you mixed up in, monkey face?”

This is a sure-fire conversation starter, especially for people whose name tag actually says “monkey face”.

“Hey Lookee!  I’ve got more hair on my arms than you have on your entire head!”

Try to avoid using this observation on women. If you can’t tell whether the bald person is a man or a woman just take a wild guess.

“I ran over two cats on the way here. How about you?”

This conversation starter is guaranteed to get attention. To avoid any misunderstandings, be sure to stress that they were your own cats you ran over and not theirs.

“Look around!  I think it’s safe to say you are the fattest person here by a long shot!”

Even though it might seem counter-intuitive, this is actually a great way to strike up a conversation because everyone enjoys having something that lends them an air of distinction.

“Don’t we know each other from AA?”

This quickly and easily establishes that the Chamber of Commerce isn’t the only organization to which you belong.

“Remember me?  I’m the one you blocked on Facebook!”

It never hurts to let people know that you “get around” and that you run in lots of different circles.

“Think you or think you not the book of Who’s Who in America should, instead, be entitled Who’s WHOM in America?”

Starting a conversation this way will impress the heck out of anyone, I don’t care who they are.

“Guess What? I have a tattoo next to my bellybutton that says, “Do Not Pierce!”

Only say this if it’s true however; otherwise, you could come off as being disingenuous should they ask to see it.

It’s uncanny!  I can’t get over how much you look like my baby daddy!

This demonstrates your excellent memory for faces.

If these conversation starters don’t catapult you to success, I don’t know what will.

Until next time . . . I love you