That’s easy for you to say, sure, but you’re not an MIT Researcher.
Researchers at MIT have come up with the world’s most difficult tongue twister in an attempt to shed light on the brain’s speech planning process while at the same time shedding light on the MIT researchers brains’ ability to think up ways to get paid without doing any actual work.
Dr. Stefanie Shattuck-Hufnagel (who prefers being called by her nickname Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers), and her scientific tongue twisting associates have deemed “pad kid poured curd pulled cold” to be the hardest phrase to utter in the English language with the exception of Dr. Stefanie Shattuck-Hufnagel’s hyphenated last name.
“Certain combinations of sounds appear to make people lose control of their mouths when spoken too quickly.” Dr. Stafanie Shattuck-Hufnagel aka Sally Sells Sea Shells at the Seashore was quoted a little too quickly as saying and shortly thereafter was hospitalized with a serious case of Uncontrollable Mouth Syndrome.
MIT has requested that all get well wishes and flowers be sent to the room where the sixth sick sheikh’s sixth sheep’s sick.
The fossil remains of a hominid species dating back 1.34 million years was discovered right where somebody left it.
The partial skeleton of a large adult hominid has been uncovered in Tanzania by a group of researchers who couldn’t wait to use the new shovels they got for their birthdays.
Researchers uncovered a 1.34-million-year-old, well-formed forearm muscle that they think its owner used for “climbing, fine-manipulation and all sorts of behaviors” Dr. Charles Musiba and his team of researchers decided after thinking about it starting at lunch time and continuing to think about it off and on all afternoon until it was finally time to go home.
“We are starting to understand the physiology of these individuals and how they adapted to the kind of habitat they lived in. The size of the arm bones suggests strong forearms and a powerful upper body.” Dr. Musiba said out loud but he was thinking, “Thank goodness he was dead or we could have gotten our butts kicked!”
Coldest place on earth discovered
Scientists have discovered a place on earth so cold that anyone out in it for even a short period of time “would see their eyes, nose and lungs freeze up within minutes.”
Scientists didn’t go on to elaborate how someone whose eyes were frozen could see their nose and lungs freeze up or how a person could see their nose and lungs freeze up even if their eyes weren’t already frozen, but Coldest Place on Earth Scientists are quick to conclude that another study involving frozen noses, eyes and lungs is in order.
One lasting between six months and six years at least! The scientists are currently writing to the government asking for a grant which is going to be harder than the scientists thought while wearing mittens.
* * *
Until next time . . . I love you