An Ode to Al Gore

An Ode To Al


Oh dear Al Gore, we love you so

For making up stuff, as you go

You’re so much fun, you’re such a  gas

And of late, a colossal mass!

Al Gore's epitaph

You are The Man of all things global

The recipient of prizes, Nobel

There’s really nothing we can do

To fill your carbon footprint shoe!

Al_Gore thinking

Though the environment’s in such a state

There’s still not too much on your plate!

There’s greenhouse gas, there’s ecosystems

(Well it’s far too numerous to list ’em)


Oh dear Al Gore, you always please

When a tear for polar bears you squeeze

And when you apply your concentration

You can actually pronounce “deforestation”!


Oh dear Al Gore, what would you do

If we weren’t burning fossil fuel

And melting glaciers left and right

To aid you in your noble fight!


When all is said and done, Dear Al

And you shuffle off to be God’s pal

Those pearly gates you’ll enter yet

For giving us the Internet


Until next time . . . I love you

20 thoughts on “An Ode to Al Gore

  1. Well said, Linda. A few years ago, I had a black-out incident and landed in the hospital. Medical science could not figure out the cause. As a result of my own investigation, I discovered an affliction which I named Home Project Shock Syndrome. This is caused by the female of a species coming up with projects for the male to accomplish.
    After this “Eureka” moment, I immediately proclaimed, “Now, I know how Al felt after he invented the internet.”

    • Hahaha! I love that story more than I love Al Gore himself! Home Project Shock Syndrome!! That deserves it’s very own essay, Russell, and you are just the writer to write it! (See what you’ve gotten yourself into now> I hope this won’t mean another trip to the hospital!) 😀

  2. Hahaha! This is probably the best poem I’ve ever read and certainty the best one ever written about Al Gore. You forgot to add a stanza about Al’s love of Funyuns.

    • Oh thank you Honey! I am so glad you liked it. I tried to work in Funyuns but the only thing that I could think of that rhymed with Funyuns was bunions. Ew! 😀

  3. Bwhahaha! An Ode to Al Gore. This was perfect, but like Jackie, I feel it needs a funyun mention… I’m going to think about that one…
    I have it!!! He loves his Funyuns, no doubt why he’s as big as Paul Bunyan!!
    (You can do better but you get the idea.) Al Gore is practically folklore like Paul Bunyan, let’s face it. He did, after all, invent the internet. 😀

    • Hahahaha!!! You are on a roll Lisa!! I can see it now! A restaurant (specializing in Funyun dishes) and a gift shop in the redwood forests with a huge Al Gore Bunyan statue outside! He could be holding a sign that says, internet access!! Haha!

  4. Ode To A Bilious Blimp… HAW!!!! Well done, Queen Of Rhyme!!

    I was just talking to St. Peter. He said the Pearly Gates aren’t wide enough for Al, even if a legion of angels rubs ’em down with the insides of greasy Funyuns bags. But there is good news: the Other Place has no gates, so they can drag that big ol’ piano crate inside, no problem!!

    P.S. I liked that next-to-last photo of Al tryna get that last Funyun crumb out of his cheek. You see the same tongue probe in his senior class yearbook photo, and all his baby pictures, too… : P

    • LOL!! Oh Mark! Those poor angels! Having to rub down Al with Funyun bags sounds like a job one might find themselves in at the Other Place! I’ll bet they don’t have any dental floss there either. Poor Al! I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a secret panel in that piano case for his Funyuns! Who says you can’t take it with you? Ha!

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