
Gosh! I haven’t been this popular since I was in the eighth grade and three boys liked me at the same time. But that magical time of youth was nothing compared to the fuss AARP and AAA are making over me. It’s enough to make a girl blush into a coma! LOL (laughing out loud)
And all because I’m so alluring (ly old).
Today it’s AAA that’s come a-courting. For instance, this tender love letter arrived only moments ago by special dispatch because, ahem . . . there’s not a minute to lose:

Now that’s exactly what I was thinking on the way to my mailbox . . . I was literally thinking if only someone, somewhere would just give an old, sick, poor loser such as myself one last chance . . . well, I just figured it was just some kind of OFFOM! (old-fogey fantasy of mine)
And then when I proceeded to read:
“Or you may want to wipe out any outstanding debts after your passsing or relieve your family from the expense of a funeral.”
Well, doggone it, my heart melted, AAA! (American Automobile Association!)
You are so Frigging Sweet! You mean to tell me you want to wipe out my debts after my passing? You are soooo adorable OMG ! (oh my god!)
One small question though– you don’t say after passing what? Do you mean after passing the bar exam or something because I’ve never been to law school — you must be getting me mixed up with someone else. ROFBAHL (rolling on floor breaking a hip laughing!)
Anyway, I’m delighted that you want to relieve my family from the expense of a funeral and that’s great and all, but we don’t normally go around paying for random people’s funerals so I’m a little confused MBTA! (must be the alzheimers!)

But wait a minute. Are you being ironic on purpose AAA? Because didn’t you just imply that any minute now I could KTB? (kick the bucket?) Oh I get it, you’re just messing with my SM! (senile mind!)
SILLY AAA! (silly american automobile association!)
PS. I so frigging love you right now I can’t even say!
************
Until next time . . . I love you
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