peculiar poetry

A Poem to Make You Think

Linda Vernon Peculiar Poetry, The Daily Routine , , , , , , , , ,

Begin at the beginning and end at the end

But then again supposin’ that road has a bend?

 

Then begin at the right and work your way left

Or come up the middle (if the road’s got a cleft)

 

Or begin at the end and work your way backwards

Or schlep up the shoulder all sloppy and slackwards

 

Or begin at the right and go in a square

Taking plenty of breaks to sit in the chairimg144

 

 

You took from that idiot right over there →

 

But whatever you do, avoid like the plague

A man with an eye patch who answers to Craig

 

And a lady named Bertha who’ll be eating a lime

(Expressly for reasons pertaining to rhyme)

 

Now take a deep breath and start on your journey

And if you get tired? Remember the gurney . . . 

 

That grandmother willed you (the one from Poughkeepsie)

That you pawned for some money to hire a gypsy

 

Who foretold of everything here you just read 

(Including the part where your Grandmother’s dead)grandma cartoon

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Georgia O’Keeffe Incident

Linda Vernon Peculiar Poetry, The Daily Routine , , , , , ,

The Georgia O'Keeffe Incident

Until next time . . . I love you

 

My Little Loch Ness Monster

Linda Vernon Peculiar Poetry, The Daily Routine , , , , , , , ,

My Little Loch Ness Monster

Lock Ness Monster by Linda VernonI have a Loch Ness monster who follows me around

He slaps his feet and quacks his beak but I don’t hear a sound

(I  keep a roll of cotton in my ears to tone it down)

 

My little Loch Ness Monster is hardly ever sick

Oh sure,  he’ll fake a stomach ache  —  but that is just his shtick

And that time he ate my neighbor? It was just a nervous tic

 

Oh my little Loch Ness Monster,  I ride him everywhere

Except for under bridges so he doesn’t mess his hair

And we stay away from bumpy roads—just too much wear and tear

 

My little Loch Ness Monster, he loves People Magazine

He eats those little cards he finds on pages in-between

(I think he does this mostly cause it’s healthy for his spleen)

 

My little Loch Ness Monster is fat and round and blue

He’d tie his own shoe laces but he cannot find his shoe

Just like  Marlon Brando, Orson Welles and Mister Depardieu

Orson Wells Marlon Brando Gerard Depardieu
‘Oh yeah Little Loch Ness Monster?   We don’t even wear shoes, so there!

 Until next time . . . I love you