Fun with Global Warming

Welcome Dear Readers to Friday Fictioneers where participants write a 100-word story about the new picture that is posted every week by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields over at Addicted to Purple.

Here’s this week’s cool picture taken by Janet Webb over at her blog, This That and The Other Thing:

Copyright Janet Webb
Copyright Janet Webb

Fun with Global Warming

“I just love Global Warming, Harvey!  I’ve lost ten pounds already on my all-fish diet!”

“You look great, Delores.  Love your shoes!”

“Thanks. I got them at Just Galoshes!”

“Oh no!  Delores!  Our new rowboat’s sprung a leak!”

“What? Where’d you get it? Oh don’t tell me!  Al Gore’s Rowboat Palace and Oar Emporium?”

“Yes.”

“Please say you got a life-time warranty, Harvey.”

“No.”

“A two-year, no-leak service plan?”

“No.”

“A 30-day guarantee?”

“No.”

“Did you get anything?”

“Just a pat on the back and two-week’s free Internet service.”

“That’s it?”

“And Al’s personal assurance.”

“Which was?”

“You’ll never Tipper!”

"Come buy my rowboats!"
“Come buy my rowboats!  Yeah!”

* * *

Thank you Rochelle Wisoff-Fields over at Addicted to Purple for faithfully hosting this super-fun challenge each and every week.

Until next time . . . I love you

Linda’s Video Writing Tips #5

Welcome to Saturday, Dear Readers.  Today I have a writing tip for you!  This one is entitled:

Thinking Outside the Box

Or

It’s just as well Rodney Dangerfield’s Dead

Have a great weekend!

 

Until next time . . . I love you

Linda’s Video Writing Tips #4

Hello and Welcome Dear Readers.  I have two writing tips for you today.  I hope you find them useful!

 

Well, that does it for this week’s video writing tips.  Have a great weekend everyone!

 

Until next time . . . I love you

Linda’s Video Writing Tips #3

Welcome Dear Readers!  Well, here we are at Day 3 of my week-long video writing tips.  Today’s topic is writing for money.

Well there you have it, Dear Readers.  Hope you enjoyed this tip.  Come back tomorrow for tip #4 in my series of video tips.

 

Until next time . . . I love you

Linda’s Video Writing Tip #2

Welcome Dear Readers to day #2 of my video writing tips.  Today’s writing topic is inspiration!

 

 

Okay so that does it for today’s tip.  Hope you enjoyed it.  Please check back tomorrow for another writing tip.

Until next time . . . I love you

Linda’s Writing-tip Video

Welcome Dear Readers! Several years ago, I made a video and put it up on YouTube.  Well here it is hundreds and hundreds of days later, and guess what?  I finally got around to making another one.  

So I thought it would be fun to make this week my video writing-tip week.  So here’s my first writing tip.

Well, there you have it, Dear Readers.

Until next time . . . I love you

Linda’s Bedtime Stories for Grown-Up Children

Randall

Randall the white owl

Nobody knew about Randall. He came in the night.

Rhonda listened for her husband’s deep breathing and when she heard the familiar rhythm she slipped out of bed, carefully slid open the door and crept onto the balcony.

Tonight was clear and still with air so crisp you could almost smell the stars. Randall was perched on the railing in his usual spot waiting for her and  staring straight ahead with his secretive eyes.

Rhonda reached into her robe pocket and pulled out a cigarette, stuck it between her lips, lit it and inhaled suddenly like a newborn taking its first breath.

“You ought to quit,” Randall said.

“Mind your own business, you dirty owl.” Rhonda snapped. Rhonda hated it when Randall complained about her smoking.   She hated a lot of things about Randall — especially the fact that he was slowly convincing her to murder her husband.

“He’s the reason you’re always having panic attacks.  Having to go to the hospital.  Not being able to breath.” Randall raised his wings and fluffed his white feathers loudly. “You’d be better off without him.”

“Who?”

“Who.   That’s my line.” Randall blinked. Then focused his gaze into Rhonda’s soul. “Don’t be obtuse.”

“I can’t do it!”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not a murderer!”

“Sure you are. You just need to get in touch with your inner murderer. Everybody’s got one. Given a certain set of circumstances, enough rage and a fortuitous blunt instrument, that is.

“You nasty snake eater! Just looking at you makes me want to take a shower!” Rhonda flicked a long ash off the end of her cigarette and aimlessly smeared it around with the toe of her slipper. “If I listen to you, I’ll end up on death row! You’re the one I should kill.”

“Ha! What’d I tell you? See how easy it is to get in touch with your inner murderer? It won’t be long now. I’ll bet you already got a gun. Maybe you stole one.”

Rhonda drew deeply on her cigarette then coughed out a harsh, smoky laugh.“Let’s just say I was able to get in touch with my inner thief.”

Someone was jiggling the balcony door. Randall took flight just before Rhonda’s husband stepped out onto the balcony.

“What the hell is going on out here? Christ sakes! Who are you talking to?”

Rhonda kept her cool. “Just having a cigarette, Robert.” She said not as pleasantly as she could muster, but pleasantly enough considering she was, after all, planning his murder.

Robert put both his hands on the railing. “Hear that? There’s an owl out there somewhere. I hear it almost every night. Must live up in one of these trees.”

A  little smile crossed Rhonda’s face as she stubbed out her cigarette and tossed it into the darkness.